New book about donor conception: Donor child - A child of love
24-year-old Emma Grønbæk grew up in a typical family constellation of mother, father, and children, but with the small difference that her parents had her with the help of a sperm donor. Now Emma has released a book about her life as a donor child and how it affected her family. With her book, Emma wants to share a positive story about being donor-conceived.
The book Donor child – A child of love has just been released in an English version. We have asked Emma what motivated her to write the book, and why you should read it.
What is Donor child – A child of love about?
“My book is about my life and how donor conception has affected my family and me. Back to how my parents struggled to have children, tried everything, and almost gave up. But also my own thoughts during times when my conception somehow played a part as I went from being a child to being an adult. The second half of the book consists of interviews with experts about topics closely related to infertility.”
Quote from the book:
“I know it’s a hurdle for many men because it’s a sad and difficult realization that you cannot become the biological father of a child. But I chose to focus on the fact that we as a couple could have our own child, whom together we could give a good life.” – Emma’s dad
Who is your new book written for?
“I think it is written for everyone really. I would love for people, in general, to understand more about donor conception and to break the taboo. But I also think it will be interesting for anyone involved in fertility treatment. Donation is still a new field in the sense that we are still learning. But of course, it is primarily for the families with donor-conceived children or for the ones who are trying to become a family through fertility treatment”
What motivated you to write the book?
“I wanted to write this book as I find that there is a lack of positive donor stories out there. Also, there are not really any books written by donor children, and that is a shame. I think it would be great for people to have the opportunity to understand more about what it means.
I wanted to write a book that potentially could help both parents and donor-conceived children. I hope that it can be a support when things are not easy. A place where they can learn to understand that the importance of conception can vary and change with age. Also, I wanted to share how my family and I went about it. I am happy about how things turned out for me, and I know that is not always the case, unfortunately.”
Quote from the book:
“In primary school, one day in class we had to talk about our family and draw family trees. I was 6 years old and used the opportunity to talk about how I came to be. I was proud to be special and I happily told about how my Mum and Dad had got sperm from a nice man we did not know so they could have me.” – Emma Grønbæk
You have invited Danish doctors and psychologists to be part of the book. How do they contribute?
“They contribute with their expertise in different fields. A psychologist explains donor conception and how it may affect a child’s well-being, a doctor explains how fertility treatment has evolved, and a couples therapist explains how infertility can affect relationships and what to do about it. The experts also explain why fertility is decreasing and much more”
Quote from the book:
"The dogma of naturalness does not make it easier for those who need fertility treatment. Many people experience that it is both sad and shameful not to be able to become a father or mother naturally – that means without help." – Stine Willum Adrian, Professor in techno-anthropology
Who do you wish to help with your book?
“I want to help people who are going through fertility treatment and make it easier for them to navigate in. I hope to make them feel less alone and help them doubt their decisions a little less. I want to help people to make happy families before or after fertility treatment!”
You can buy Emma’s book Donor child – A child of love on her website: www.donorchildbyemmagroenbaek.com.