PrivateBlogWhat to say to someone going through fertility treatment?
Infertility and treatment

What to say to someone going through fertility treatment?

Two women talking about fertility treatment

When your family or friends enter fertility treatment, you want to be supportive and understanding. However, many people do not know how to start a conversation about fertility treatment and as a result, they avoid the topic. In this blog post, we have created a guide on how to talk about fertility treatment to help you be there for the people you love.

Struggling to have a child can be emotionally and physically demanding. The feelings experienced when dealing with infertility is similar to the feelings you experience when losing someone you care about. Therefore, being supportive and understanding during this time can mean the world to someone going through fertility treatment. Here below are a few tips you can use to go about the topic as a friend or family member:

It is okay to ask questions, but respect boundaries

Struggling with infertility and going through fertility treatment is personal, and there may be details that they do not want to share. Let them decide when and what to share – asking them about treatment results or status updates can cause unnecessary stress or pain.

Do your research

There are ways to learn and understand what they are going through. Read about the treatment they are having, and/or personal stories (books, Instagram accounts, etc.) by others struggling with the same. If they are having fertility treatment with donor sperm, you can read more about the process by following the link.

Show empathy and understanding

Infertility can be a lonely and isolating experience. Showing empathy and understanding can go a long way in supporting your loved one. Let them know you are here if they want to talk. You can also offer to attend difficult appointments with them or to pick them up at the clinic after a procedure.

Woman talking about fertility treatment with her mother

Do not minimize the struggle

Comments such as "trust me, being a parent is not all sunshine and roses” or “just relax, your time will come" can be hurtful to someone going through fertility treatment. Each missed cycle or failed attempt is heart-breaking.

Offer practical help

Offer to help with practical tasks such as looking after their older children or cooking meals. This can be a great way to show support and alleviate some of the stress of daily life.

Celebrate the small victories

Fertility treatments can often be a rollercoaster of emotions. Celebrating small victories, such as a successful egg retrieval or positive test result, can help lift the spirits of someone going through treatment.

Respect their decisions

Fertility treatments can be a personal and complex decision. It is important to respect their choices and not pressure them into making decisions they are not comfortable with. They may decide to stop treatments, take a pause or even go abroad for treatment (fertility tourism). Either way, it is their choice. If you want to read a personal story about receiving fertility treatment abroad, then follow the link to read Phoebe and her wife’s story about going to Denmark to receive fulfil their dream.

Do not take it personal

Attending baby showers or showing unconditional excitement over someone’s pregnancy announcement can be really hard when you are struggling to conceive. Do not keep them in the dark, but respect their pain, and do not take it personal if they react differently than expected or do not share your joy at this point.

If you want to learn more about the fertility treatment your friends or family are receiving, we have created blog posts explaining everything related to each type of treatment. Here below you can find the different blog posts:

If you have other questions regarding fertility treatment with donor sperm, feel free to contact our Customer Care Consultants to receive answers to any questions you might have.