At Cryos, we let you decide yourself if you wish to be an ID Release, Early ID Release, or Non-ID Release Donor – in short, whether you want to give children conceived with your egg donation the opportunity to receive identifying information about you after turning 18 years old.
The difference between being an ID Release, Early ID Release, or a Non-ID Release Donor
When you become an egg donor at Cryos, we ask you to decide whether you want to be ID Release, Early ID Release, or Non-ID Release. This is a decision that requires some consideration. If you choose to be an ID Release Donor, children born with help from your egg donation can contact Cryos after turning 18 and receive identifying information about you. They can use this information to try to contact you if they would like to learn more about their origins.
If you choose to become an Early ID Release Donor, you authorize Cryos to disclose your identifying information to parents who conceive a child using your donations, provided they can document this. The information may be disclosed upon request from the child’s birth until the child turns 18. After the age of 18, the information may only be disclosed to the child.
As a donor, you will not be able to get identifying information about potential donor-conceived children, so it is up to the child to decide whether to try to initiate contact. If contacted, it is up to you what level of contact – if any – you want to engage in.
If you are a Non-ID Release Donor, it means that Cryos will never reveal identifying information about you to children born from your donations.
Can donor-conceived children find their donor?
No matter whether you decide to become a Non-ID Release, Early ID Release or ID Release Donor, there is a chance that a child conceived with your donation may try to reach you in the future.
New possibilities to find genetic relatives
Even though information about Non-ID Release Donors is never released by Cryos to any donor-conceived children or their parents, there are ways for these children to potentially learn more about their donors. The advances of DNA search, heritage research and new technologies have given donor-conceived children new opportunities to learn more about their genetic origin.
Cryos safeguards your personal data
At Cryos we do not help or encourage any donor-conceived children or their parents to seek out information about a Non-ID Release Donor. Furthermore, when receiving treatment with donor eggs from a Non-ID Release Donor at Cryos, the patients sign an agreement not to seek information about the donor in the future. In short, we take every possible step to ensure the safety of your personal information and confidentiality and to safeguard your anonymity as a donor. Still, for some donor-conceived children, the desire to know more about their genetic origin is so strong that they take steps to learn more about their donor, even if she is a Non-ID Release Donor.
Remember to talk to your partner about being a donor
A thing to consider when choosing to be an egg donor is to inform your current and/or future partners about the fact that you are a donor. This will keep matters less complicated if you are contacted by a donor-conceived child in the future.
In the following, we provide some advice on what to do if you are contacted by a child conceived with your donation.
What should I do if a donor-conceived child or its parents try to contact me?
We have made a list with some advice to help make it the best possible experience:
- If a donor-conceived child contacts you - or the parents of a donor-conceived child, in case you are an Early ID Release donor - you should consider what type of relationship - if any - you would want to have with the child going forward. Are you open to a close relationship, or do you prefer a casual relation? Perhaps you only want to meet the child once – or not at all?
- Listen to what they have to say before making any decisions on your future relationship or replying to them.
- Tell him or her how you feel about being contacted and that it may or may not have come as a surprise for you that your identity is now known to them.
- Even though it might be surprising and unexpected to you, remember that the child (or parents) most likely has given it a lot of thought before contacting you.
- Tell them about your wishes and expectations regarding future contact and a possible relationship.
Why some children seek contact with their donor
Research shows that a donor-conceived child who wants to contact his or her donor is rarely looking to invade the donor’s privacy. Nor is the child looking for an active parent. Instead, most donor-conceived children are:
- Curious to know more about their genetic heritage.
- Interested in knowing what their biological origin looks like.
- Looking to establish a casual relationship or hoping to form a closer bond.
- Interested in asking a few questions.
In any case, many donor-conceived children and parents are advised to let the donor set the terms and decide the level of commitment to the relationship.
It is also worth noting that far from all donor-conceived children and parents have the need or desire to know more about their egg donor. For many donor-conceived children and parents, knowing that a nice woman once helped to give the greatest gift by donating her eggs is enough to satisfy their needs.